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02 March 2006

Ab Machines Demystified

Okie. Today I will write about ab machines :) I think most of you would know what I'm talking about lah... It's those contraptions that allow you to lie on the floor with your head comfortably placed on the machine's head rest... and then all you do is rock it back and forth to get a good abdominal workout. Other variations are now also available, but basically they allow for an arc like rocking movement :) Oh! I forgot! There's also the versions that only require you to.... NOT MOVE! Yeps... you got me right. Just strap on the device (that looks like one of those 'bengkung' thinggies... dont know what its called in English) around your your flabby, beer belly mid section, turn the switch on... and VOILA! Six pack abs :P ...

But do these things really work? Can they make you look sexy with so little effort?
We shall see :)

I will try to demistify all the myths surrounding ab machines...
based on my own experience that is. Hehehehe. Hope that holds enuff water for all a'ya :)

................... OLD STORIES STARTING ..........................

When I was about... 19, I wanted a flat, six-packed mid section. Hey... who doesn't :P Fate had it, at the same time I was dreaming, these infomercials started to pop up on Malaysian TV channels. Smart Shop from TV3 was one of the first to advertise ab devices. And the first one I saw was Tony Little's AB ISOLATOR! Man! Was I awed!!! I was thinking that my dream of getting six pack abs was gonna become a reality!!! But unfortunately, I didn't have the cash at the time for I was a mere college student :P That 'oppurtunity' went begging....


The Ab Isolator

But then, came another device. Forget its name, but I think it had the word 'rocker' in it. Ab Rocker if I'm not mistaken. This one looked something like the picture below... only it had platforms for the bented-bars to stand on.


The Ab Rocker... I guess...b>


I managed to purchase this one, cuz my mother was with me when the informercial was on, and she allowed me to use her credit card to make the order...

Happy Happy Happy :)

I tried the first workout... Man! Was it hard! The fitness instructor did the whole thing like it was nothing. I on the other hand, suffered one of the most painful stomach pains of my life!!!!

Crazy or what! I was totally flabby and unfit, that the whole excercise left me with an aching mid section, and still... a one pack (of flab) stomach.... But, I did only do the excercise ONCE! HAHAHAHA!!! So, the whole blame wasn't on the instructor... but mostly on me.

Eventually I returned it, and I presume that my mom's card was reimbursed.
I returned it NOT becuz I wasn't able to do the excercise. It's just that, they showed in the infomercial that the device so so damn stable! But when I was using it... it moved around on the floor like there was a mini earth quake!

Anyway... returning the rocker was a blessing in disguise. Because many years later... I came to learn that ab rocking, or ab isolating is NOTthe way to get a six pack :) Or to lose weight for that matter.

................. END OF PERSONAL EXPERIENCE ..........................

Nowadays... we get bombarded with lots and lots of infomercials that advertise fitness devices that are supposed to be the answer to everyone'ss weight problem!

Most of them, naturally, will target ABDOMINAL issues.

Beer belly, Pot Belly, Spare Tyres, Love Handles... you name it :) They've got the answers for it!

Ok... Let's look at one...

The Abtronic or watchama-callit? Ok. You strap this thing around your mid section... turn on the current... and let it shake. The voltage, or something is supposed to melt away the fat and reveal the all wonderful all beautiful six pack mid section.


Abstronic





Even if you go to Alamanda (Putrajaya), you could see salesgirls promoting similar products... I saw one at OSIM, ... or was it OGAWA... Nope. OSIM I. Cuz I don't think they have OGAWA at Alamanda, right?

Uhhhmmmmmm.... Okie.... So simple aye? Just strap around yer waist... and PRESTO!... I wonder why there're still so many fatso's out there :P

The answer could be that... machines like these are SCAMS! I mean... come onnnn... get a six pack by just sitting down watching TV while some waist-wrapper buzzes on and "shocks" your belly with 'invisible' electricity? Sheessh....

I read an article on the net... referenced at the Excercise Equipment Explained website...

The devices are so questionable that the Federal Trade Commission launched "Project ABSurd" against the makers of the AB Energizer, Abtronic, and Fast Abs in 2002.

Some more reference from the same website::

"These electronic abs gadgets don't do a thing to turn a bulging beer belly into a sleek six-pack stomach," said FTC Chairman Timothy Muris. The government sued the three manufacturers for false advertising. In July 2003, the FTC announced a settlement of over $5 million in the lawsuit against Fast Abs, and courts in Nevada have held five Ab Tronic defendants liable for $83 million. While the charges against AB Energizer are still pending, the FTC filed yet another complaint in October 2003 against the makers of a similar device called the "Ab Force" belt.

Whoa... now that's heavy don't ya reckon... :(

Even though the Abtronics does simulate muscle (they are categorized as Electronic Muscle Stimulators), this muscle 'tickling' isn't enough to burn away the stubborn fat and stimulate muscle growth. It's just another worthless gizmo, preying on the weak and fat and flabby :P

...
..
.

Another device is... I think... is called the Ab King something...
Looks something like this:



The Ab King Something


Ok. The fitness models who endorse the device are undeniably... fit and rip to shreds! (When I say rip to shreds, I mean they've got almost no fat on their bodies). But don't get me wrong, the Ab King can give you a good ab workout. But... the way the informercials are presented seem to show that, JUST BY USING THIS DEVICE, ALL YOUR FAT WILL MELT AWAY... AND A SIX PACK STOMACH IS INEVITABLE!!!!

What a bunch of cow dung :(

Basically what I'm trying to convey is that... an ab machine ALONE, will not suffice. Because...

  1. There's no such thing as spot reduction. You can't choose where you want to lose your fat first! Your genetics determine where the fat is stored first... and also determines from where it leaves first. Devices or diets or even programs that promote spot reduction, or losing fat from a specified part of your body... is doomed for failure! They just don't work!

  2. You can't melt fat away just by excercising. The adage... YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT is so freakin' true! Even if you excercise like a freako-zoid... if you don't eat right, you're not gonna get those abs poppin' out :)
...............................................................................

So, the verdict on ab machines?

Ok... The ones that promote movement and the ones that actually require you to excercise and sweat some sweat... those are ok. BUT! Some argue that ab excercise such as the crunch, reverse crunch and also side crunches (to name a few), are already relatively easy to perform. So, why the need for a device that makes an easy job easier? Hmmmmmmmmmmm... I donno, you be the judge :)

Anyway, the thing is... yes, these devices can be used. As a matter of fact, it might be good for people with a history of back or even neck pain (this is just my opinion). However, it must be part of a workout plan/routine... where working the abs is just one of the many body parts that you train. Plus, an important eating plan is also important to implement. Because, again, the adage of "you are what you eat" is very true, like I mentioned before. Normally, it would be 4-6 meals per day (some even go for 8!). But in smaller portions.

In short, you need to excercise (where abs are one of the body parts to excercise)...
BOTH! Cardio and Weights to get better results.
And you also need to eat frequent, well (smaller) portioned, healthy foods... where each meal must have both, carbs and protein... and of course, green veggies :)

Basically, U need to excercise your muscles to expend energy... And in order to fuel this energy need, we must aim for fuel from FAT cells. When almost all of them are gone (we do need some for health purposes)... only then will you start seeing your mid section. Because, if you don't... it's not becuz there's no muscle there. It's just becuz you have too thick a layer of fat covering the muscle. Excercise, eat right and live healthy... that's the way to go... and your fat cells will be crying for you to let them back in (which you must NOT!... :P)

As for the Abtronic... just DONT fall into the pit of despair by getting them. Not only are they quite dear (expensive)... THEY DONT WORK!!!! PERIOD! So, put your money to better use... and get yourself a book or two on how to get fit. As this blog has Google as its partner, maybe some of books of interest may appear on this page, due to Google :) I donno, you just take a look around.

Anyway....

Are Ab Machines bad? ... you hold the final word. The machines can work... but why waste the extra $$$ when you can achieve the same results by just using your GOD given bodies.

The tronics? Hehehehe. Let's just see how those law suits are doing. Steer clear of them. There's no such thing as a free six-pack. You need to SWEAT BLOOD for them!!!!!

Okie dokie.

I think I've rambled enuff :) Hope this was beneficial for you. Have a nice one :)

Cheers! And Happy Ab-bing :)




Six Pack... tutup aurat tapi. Hehehe


PS:- This is another freakin scamming device, where you press your stomach against it... I mean, what kind of excercise is that? You might end up 'sh##ting'! LOL!



Ab Watchama-Callit Inna-dey-er

8 Comments:

  • my father pernah beli bende nih dulu2. tapi i rasa kebersanannyer depends on YOU. i think what they say is true but it's up to YOU to keep on exercise using it and not giving up plus kene eat the right food. jgnlah exercise and then mkn nasi 3 pinggan mmg lah boroi balik. hehe...

    By Blogger princessren, at Thu Mar 02, 05:25:00 PM  

  • eh..bukan ke ab rocker tu tempat sidai towel or baju???
    yang tu ke yg ko jual balik?

    By Blogger Abu S.H, at Fri Mar 03, 12:55:00 AM  

  • Hahahaha!

    Yang tu yang beli dekat Subang Parade dulu tu. Aku, Kosrin ngan sapa ntah. Kitorang beli sama sama. Tapi masa tu masing2 jahilliyah sket :P Tak tau pasal nutrition + excercise + meal frequency. Main beli je ikut iklan. Tu pasal tak jadi menda. hehehehe

    Dan betui, mmg jadik tempat sidai tuala. Tapi ntah pegi mana ntah yg tu. Yang aku pulang balik tu masa zaman PRA-UiTM. Masa awal2 PPP :) Takde sapa tau kecuali aku korga-ku dan juga.. dan sememangnya... Allah 'Azza Wa Jalla :)

    By Blogger Ahmad Javanese, at Fri Mar 03, 02:30:00 AM  

  • Betui tu Mary. Usaha sendiri mmg penting

    Tapi yg aku tensen ialah iklan2 tu la. Dia seolah2 kata yg... All you need is our device/machine/bull-shaitz. And you will get the abs of your dream.

    Dah le target perot aje. Mana lojik!

    Pernah kah ku jumpa sapa2 yang perot dia tough, tapi ada tetek (utk laki2 la maksud aku. heheheheh) yg menggelebeh.

    VEry2 unlikely. That's why I say, all these ab adverts are damn liars! (Or at least they dont tell the whole story) :)

    Cheers!

    By Blogger Ahmad Javanese, at Fri Mar 03, 02:32:00 AM  

  • betul2.. keep such articles coming.. aku suka... suka baca je la... stuff on nutrition tu haram aku x terbuat... hehehehe

    By Blogger Unknown, at Fri Mar 03, 10:32:00 AM  

  • hucs,
    betul la itu, sidai kucing mati pon boleh...

    pian...
    woih panjangnya ko tulis, benda ko minat ko tulis tak ingat punya. sure kempes perut pian lepas menulis ni sebab lapar.

    model2 yang dia pakai ntuk iklankan benda2 ni semua dah lama ada six pack. ada la sorang dua loser dia selit before and after punya picture. itu abang rasa orang2 dia sendiri yang dia dera kat guatonamo prison tak bagi makan... tu yang bila di interview jawab pon semacam je... "I hated my self when I was fat,bla bla bla"... hotak dia...

    kan banyak alat2 excercise ko dok layan beli. yang abtronic tu tak beli ke? itu untuk orang2 yang dah ada semua alat excercise tapi masih nak excercise walaupun dok diam2... belilah satu... nanti ko pi aussie ko tinggalkan untuk aku...

    By Blogger Izhal, at Fri Mar 03, 06:22:00 PM  

  • NAAAAAAAK... nak arm strap tuh.. kasi senang jogging... soh babah antar.. murah ajer..

    By Blogger Ija, at Fri Mar 03, 09:26:00 PM  

  • Hi you have got a good info on your blog which is worth reading, even I have a Muscle toning related website and blog. I should say good job done

    By Blogger Sreenivasa S, at Sun Apr 23, 08:16:00 PM  

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